There’s nothing quite like sitting down on a crisp fall Sunday morning to write about my wife’s uterus. I suppose I could have written something generic about the topic of uterine fibroids, but I prefer to write personal stories about true-life experiences that have the potential to inspire and motivate readers.
It all started about a year after we got married. During our first year of marriage, like most couples, our focus was on starting a family, which meant we did our best to make that happen. So far, so good.
But after almost a year of trying without success, we began to wonder if something might be wrong. Off we went to see the fertility specialist, who first asked how old my wife was, then took a blood sample to measure her level of follicle stimulating hormone (FSH), which is the main hormone involved in producing mature eggs. Then he did an ultrasound test to check out her uterus.
When they gave us the results, it would have felt better if they had used a shotgun. At age 39, my wife had an FSH score of 12 (the odds of conception at anything over 10 is virtually zero). Not only that, but they also found three uterine fibroids in three different areas, or levels, in the lining of her uterus.
How bad news spurred us into action
I’ll spare you the grief and heartache we went through that day—the day we were told we would never have a child. I can tell you that when I get bad news, I feel the same emotions of hopelessness, grief, and frustration as anyone else would in the same circumstances. I also have to admit that I expressed my rage in a torrent of choice words (mostly R-rated). For me, it was the release I needed, and it was the first step on our road to recovery.
For as quickly as the bad news had created a sense of hopelessness, my wife and I were somehow able to put aside the negative and begin to focus on what we could do rather than what we couldn’t. Within 12 months of that terrible day, we finalized the adoption of our daughter, Jessica Taylor.
In fact, from the first day we signed any paperwork to the time we were standing in front of a judge, it took only 10 months—a land speed record in the world of domestic infant adoption. Jessica will be 5 next month, and if my wife and I had simply sat by and gotten negative and depressed, she surely would not be in our lives today.
What you need to know
While not truly understanding what a uterine fibroid tumor was at the time and only hearing the word “tumor,” I immediately went to work to learn everything I could about them. And, like anything else, the answer is out there—you just have to ask the right questions, find the right people, and knock on the right doors.
Of course, the doctor we had only wanted to sell us a $20,000 Egg donor fertility package. He could not have cared one bit about the fibroids and the emotions my wife was experiencing when she learned she had them—let alone offer us a solution.
The first bit of good news I found was that fibroids are rarely cancerous. In fact, some are even asymptomatic, meaning they don’t have any symptoms. Many women, however, will experience symptoms such as abnormal bleeding, pelvic pain, bowel and bladder irregularity, and painful or uncomfortable intercourse. In some case, fibroids can cause a distended abdomen.